Greetings!
My husband and I were inside a big shopping mall. We had bought something from a department store. As we came out of the department store, I noticed there was a gifts shop to the right. I told my husband I wanted to buy a birthday card for my sister.
Soon after we walked in, I heard a man said, "Watch that Chinese woman! She is holding a shopping bag. She is going to steal something and put it into the bag." I turned to find the source of the voice. The counter was in the middle of the store. A man in shirt and tie was standing behind two female cashiers. I took a quick look at him. He was a white male in his 40 s. He caught my glance. He stared back at me with spite. He said to the cashiers again, "Watch that Chinese woman. I am sure she will steal something and try to walk out without paying..." He must be the manager of the store, I thought. He had probably assumed I did not understand English. The cashiers did not say anything in response to what he said.
My husband did not speak English. In a quiet voice, I told him what I heard. He said, "Let's buy a card somewhere else." I said, "It may be I should not have walked in with a shopping bag." He said, "Other people walk in with shopping bags too! This is a mall where people come to shop. That manager is racist. Let's leave." I looked around. Indeed, many people had shopping bags in their hands. I told my husband I would buy a card there. He gave me a puzzled look. I asked him to wait for me outside.
I took the time to choose a nice card. A few people were in front of me when I lined up to pay. As I waited for my turn, some people lined up behind me. Many had shopping bags in their hands just like me except I was the only person of color.
When it was my turn, I handed the cashier the card and paid for it. Then I said to the manager, "Soon after I walked in, you said to the cashiers to watch that Chinese woman. You thought I did not know English. You openly told them I was going to steal something and put it into my shopping bag." He opened his mouth. Before he said anything, I asked the cashiers, "You heard him said those words, didn't you?" They looked downwards, and did not say anything to counter what I said. Seeing that, the manager could no longer hold onto his mean demeanor. He stood there stiffly, and did not say anything.
I looked at the people that lined up behind me. They were looking at the manager. I said, "I am not the only one who walks in with a shopping bag. Many of your customers carry shopping bags in their hands too. It is not because of the shopping bag, isn't it? It is because I am a Chinese that you think I will steal. How long have you been the manager of this store? 10 years? 20 years? How many Chinese have you caught stealing?" I waited for him to answer.
The manager's face turned very red. I said, "None. Is that correct?" He murmured, "I am sorry." I said, "Hearing your racist remarks, my husband asked me to buy a card somewhere else. I choose to stay. I want to tell you it is wrong to discriminate against others because of their race, skin color, or appearance. More importantly, I feel I should talk to you because you are a manager. As a manager, you have an influence over those that work for you. When you voice your racist view, some people may unknowingly take in what you say. There is a saying 'Treat others as how you want to be treated'. I hope you will think about what I said." The manager said, "I am sorry." I walked out of the store.
The above incident happened long time ago. I had arrived in the USA a few weeks earlier. I was very self-conscious that I was not fluent in English. However, deep within I felt I should talk to the manager. I had not planned what to say, but words came as I spoke.
When I questioned the manager how many Chinese he had caught shoplifting, I never meant to imply Chinese did not steal. We, the Chinese, were not any different from other races. Some Chinese committed crimes too. At the time, there were far less Chinese living in where we lived than it was today. Other than those that came to attend universities, many Chinese did not know much English like my husband. They worked long hours in restaurants and stores owned by Chinese. All they wanted was to earn a living. Most of them (or us) knew not to commit any crimes.
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Other than the above occasion, I seldom chose to speak up again when I came across people who were racist. I might take a stand by action as I did in Racism and Discrimination - Story 3 . In my opinion, debates hardly changed people's racist views, and only experiences would.
In Racism and Discrimination - Story 1, the teacher was raised in a family with strong racist views. Through interactions with his friends and coworkers of other races, he gradually realized his parents were wrong. He did not have to share his racist upbringing with his students, but he chose to. He told his students that it was wrong to discriminate others based on our differences. As he opened up and shared his story truthfully, his words touched many young women and men in his classes (my son included). When these students had families of their own, it was foreseeable they would teach their children to treat others with fairness.
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We all play a part in how the world turns out to be. Racism causes separation among us. It is with hope and faith that we come out of our experiences with positive influence on others as the teacher has on his students.
Love and blessings,
Q of D
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