Greetings!
As I began to write this post, I thought of a teacher whom I had not met. He was my younger son's high school teacher.
One day in class, the teacher told his students that he was born in a family that held strong discriminating views against other races. He grew up hearing his parents and some relatives making racist remarks. He went to school and then college. He met people outside of his family. His circle of friends expanded, and he worked with people of other races too. He realized his family was wrong. It was a long soul searching process, and this courageous teacher shared it all. He went on to give his students a heartfelt talk on racism. He told them it was wrong to discriminate others based on our differences such as races, appearances, and beliefs.
My son liked to keep things to himself. He seldom talked about what happened in school. When he came home that day, he shared with me his teacher's story. Obviously, his teacher's truthful talk had touched him and some of his classmates deeply. My son said, "Mom, you had taught us not to judge or discriminate others since we were small. I cannot imagine how difficult it must be for my teacher to turn around completely and love all people as he does. My teacher is married and has his own family. He said he had talked to his parents and relatives about racism. At first, he tried to correct them whenever they made racist remarks in front of him. However, he has learned old habits die hard, and people would only change when they are ready. When his visits, his parents and relatives still say those offensive racist words, but far less than before."
As parents, we might try to instill in our children values and virtues (or wrong views in some cases). However, I agreed with Abraham - Hicks that 'words don't teach; it is life experience that teaches'. In other words, life experience had a greater impact in our lives than simply words. For example, a man got a call from the manager of a convenient store. His teenage daughter and a few of her friends had been detained in the store for shoplifting. After all the parents arrived, the manager gave the girls a stern warning. He told the girls that shoplifting was a crime, and they could go to jail for what they did. He assured them he would call the police if they did it again. The father of the teenage girl was ashamed and heart broken. He said he had taught his daughter values and honesty. He gave her more than enough allowance weekly. He did not understand why it happened. His daughter said she did it because she was bored. When one of her friends suggested to run out of the store without paying, she thought it was exciting. Therefore, words were just words when the teenage girl did not take what her father taught to heart.
Despite of how he was raised, the teacher did not grow up to be a racist. My son said he was a very good teacher. Many students loved and respected him. This teacher did not have to share his racist upbringing, but he chose to. As he shared his story with emotions, honesty, and sincerity, he connected with the students from the depth of his heart. It was the teacher's story. However, for those students whose hearts were open to receive that day, they had an experience that would affect them for the rest of their lives. They knew and agreed it was wrong to discriminate others based on our differences. In time, they would pass that to their children too.
Our voice is a gift. There is power in the words we speak. It is especially powerful when we speak from the depth of our hearts with love and compassion. The teacher has taught high school for decades. I believe he has shared his story with the students many times over the years.
Thank you, Teacher, for making a difference in our world.
Love,
Q of D
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