I was grateful for the opportunity to speak at church

Greetings!

In Our Voices Matter, I blurted out to my friend that I would like an opportunity to speak at church.  On that Sunday, I had not planned to say that at all.  Those words simply came out of my mouth when my friend tried to convince me to hold another healing workshop.

My friend said she would relate it to the pastors.  (My friend was on the board of directors, but she was not a pastor.)  She said she knew I did not have any public speaking experience, however, it was required that all Sunday speakers must be experienced public speakers.  The board of pastors met once a month.  My friend said it might take some time for the pastors to decide on my request.  She suggested for me to hold a healing workshop in the next two or three months.  She would videotape the workshop.  Then I would have a DVD to present to the pastors that I could speak in public.  I told my friend it would be all right if the pastors concluded I was not qualified.  All Is Well in the Divine Plan.  I felt at ease after I finally voiced what I truly wanted to do, i.e. to connect with my brothers and sisters through sharing my experiences.

It turned out I did not need any DVD.  Two weeks later, the board of pastors kindly accepted my request.  When I heard the news, I felt somewhat anxious because I knew I needed more time than others to get ready for the talk.  When I talked to the pastor that was responsible for scheduling Sunday speakers, I was relieved to know that the schedule was filled many months ahead.  The earliest date that was open was next January.

Though it seemed I had plenty of time to get ready, I could only get into the mood of preparing for my talk until the time was near.  After I spoke at church, I was relieved my self-set assignment was finished.  I did not anticipate the church to ask me to speak again.  Some months later, I was surprised that the pastor asked me to pick another date.

After my first talk, someone said I must have gotten some sort of satisfaction from the response of the congregation.  The truth was I never looked at it that way.  With no public speaking experience on record, I was grateful that the board of pastors allowed me to speak at church.  Most of all, I was grateful for the opportunity to connect with my brothers and sisters on a heart to heart level.

My friend that related my request to the church had worked with me side by side during the healing workshops.  I am forever grateful for her love and support.  Dear Sister, thank you.

As I wrote that my speaking at church was a self-set assignment, I realized an assignment given by my 4th grade teacher must have been part of the Divine Plan.

In my next post, I will share with you the story.

Love,
Q of D
     

Our Voices Matter

Greetings!

In my last post A beautiful red heart on the TV screen, I connected my dream to the Sunday service because both had a beautiful red heart on the TV screen.

The church videotaped all the Sunday services.  We could borrow any DVD and watch it at home.  It was free.

I spoke at church for the first time in Jan. of 2010.  When it was over, I was very relieved that I had finished the assignment, a self-set assignment.  I did not borrow the DVD to see how I did that Sunday.  All I wanted was to connect with my brothers and sisters through sharing the lessons I learned, and I had done that.  After I spoke on Feb. 13, 2011, I did not think of borrowing the DVD too.  If the kind pastor had not given me the DVD, I would not have seen the last scene of a red heart on the wall and understood my dream of a heart on the TV screen.

Though the church I called my spiritual home was small, we had ten pastors.  They gave their time and money to support the church.  They had been on their spiritual journey for a long time.  They were wonderful speakers, musicians, healers and teachers.  On most Sundays, we also had speakers that came from other places and countries.  They were known spiritual teachers of all faiths, musicians, workshop facilitators, psychics / mediums and healers.  As far as I knew, they drove or flew to our church on their own expenses.  Their loving presence was felt and greatly appreciated by all.    

I mentioned my talk at church was a self-set assignment.  Indeed, it was.  One day after service, my friend urged me to consider holding another healing workshop.  I was very hesitant to do so.  I knew healing energy flowed through me to others as I sat among people.  However, I did not feel I was qualified to hold workshops***.  As my friend tried to convince me, I blurted out that I wanted an opportunity to talk to my brothers and sisters at church.  My friend who was on the board of directors looked at me.  Then she said, "I'll talk to the church about it."  Therefore, it was a self-set assignment for the church had not asked me to speak.

Since I was not comfortable speaking in English, why in the world did I ask to speak at church?

A while back, the church had invited some old members to come back and share with us their stories on their spiritual journey.  They were now guides and workshop facilitators to help others on their spiritual paths.  They were all loving, humble and truthful.  Their personal stories were amazing.  Their courage to following their callings was inspiring.  After listening to their talks, the urge within to follow their footsteps sounded loudly at night.  In time, the urge began to wane.  I told myself, "They are doctors and professionals.  They are highly educated and wonderful speakers.  I can't even speak English correctly.  I should forget about what I want to do (i.e. to share with my brothers and sisters about the lessons I learn)."

As I put it behind me, my guides and angels had their way of inspiring me.  One night, I could not sleep.  I grabbed a magazine from the night stand.  It was an old spiritual magazine.  This monthly magazine was published in the state* we used to lived.  After we moved, my older son paid for a year subscription as his Christmas gift for me.  He renewed the subscription a year later.  However, two months into that year, the editor decided the magazine had served its purpose.  There was no more publication after that.  Anyway, I opened the magazine and saw the name John St. Augustine.  The ignorant me had never heard of such a last name.  Out of curiosity, I began to read his story.  What he said touched my heart deeply.  It was his words that caused me to blurt out to my friend that I wanted an opportunity to speak and connect with my brothers and sisters at church.

In the interview, John St. Augustine, a well known inspirational speaker, radio talk show host and author, was asked if there was a story or a person that really stood out for him.  He said first and foremost was John Denver, a famous musician and singer.

Below were his words in the magazine.

Years ago in Boston, I was backstage with John Denver.  ...  We'd been friends for a while.  He put his hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eyes and said, "Do you have any idea how much your voice matters in the way things go?" . . . He reminded me of something that I'd forgotten or that had been buried within . . . Had he not said those words to me, I don't know what direction my life would or wouldn't have gone, but I think it was a precursor to getting on the air.  I think our voices all matter.  John did it in song.  I do it on the radio.  Oprah does it on TV.  We all do our own thing, but you have to remember that your voice matters first, before you ever use it.

John St. Augustine said, "I believe we've forgotten that our voices matter, or that we should be using our voices for creating or giving aid to a problem or challenge, as opposed to just talking about reality television or something.  We only have so much time here.  So what you put your voice to while you're here is pretty much of paramount importance."

Let us take in this brother's words of wisdom and remember Our Voices Matter.

Love,
Q of D

*We had moved back to this state five years ago.

*** I went to a 2-day healing workshop in March 2007.  The teacher told us she would come back to hold a class for teachers of the healing art in Oct. / Nov.  However, I had to move to another state in August.  Therefore, I never took a class for teachers.  With no qualification and little experience in healing, I did not see myself as a healer not to mention to hold a workshop.  However, a holistic store printed out their calendar with me holding a workshop in Feb. 2009 without asking me.  (Re A beautiful pink fish on the back of a white dove )  Eventually, I understood going to the Mar. 2007 workshop was but a process to remember what was within.

A Beautiful Red Heart on the TV Screen

Greetings!

Today is February 13, 2017.  Tomorrow will be Valentine's Day.  This morning I woke up remembering I spoke at church on a Feb. 13 Sunday six years ago.  I also recalled the interesting coincidence between a dream and the day I spoke.

On the Sunday I spoke, the chapel was decorated with beautiful red hearts because the next day would be Valentine's Day.  Some hearts hanged down from the ceiling, and some were on the walls.  I felt at ease in this joyful and peaceful atmosphere.  My English was not proficient.  However, I had faith that my loving brothers and sisters would understand me as I spoke from my heart.

After the service was over, some people came to talk to me.  A sister that was very connected to the Divine said she knew the stories I shared were true.  She practically went through my experiences as I shared them.  Another woman said she was the chairwoman of her church's women's group.  She came to our church once in a long while.  She had originally planned to go to her church, but her angels nudged her to come to our church.  She said she now understood why her angels guided her to come.  Her kind words and encouragement touched my heart.

A week later, the pastor that videotaped Sunday services gave me a DVD of last Sunday's service.  He said it was a gift and would not accept any money from me.  (In our church, the fee for a copy of any Sunday service is $12.)  Thank you, Brother.

When I was home, I watched the DVD on the television.  The last image was a beautiful red heart on the TV screen.  Immediately, it reminded me of a dream.  In the dream, I was watching the television.  On the screen was a small red heart.  Why was there a heart on the screen, I wondered.  At the time, I did not know what to make of the dream.  Later, I recorded the dream.  I drew a big heart that took up the whole page at the back as if to symbolize a heart that loved all.

Have a Happy Valentine's Day!

Love,
Q of D
 

Charlie is good looking

Greetings!

We invited our younger son and his family to come over to celebrate the Chinese New Year.

After we ate, our daughter-in-law suggested for us to play the Gossip Game.  She knew I had not heard of the name of the game.  She explained to me that one person would whisper a phrase to the person next to him, then that person would whisper what he heard to the next person, and the last person that heard the whispered phrase would say it out loud.  My daughter-in-law said, "A lot of times, it turns out that the phrase is completely distorted.  It is a good game to play in the school.  It is a fun game, and, it is educational.  Students will learn gossips do not equate to truth."

We stood in a circle.  My daughter-in-law said we could ask the one who related the phrase to repeat it if we were not sure of what we heard.  My oldest grandson volunteered to be the one that came up with a phrase.  He thought for a while.  He whispered the phrase to his sister.  My younger son leaned down to hear the words from his daughter.  My son told me the words.  I had doubts.  I asked him to repeat the phrase.

Right then, my older son came out of the bathroom.  When he learned we were playing the Gossip Game, he said he wanted to play too.  He went to stand at the end of the line of Gossip.  I told my daughter-in-law of what I thought I heard.  She in turn said it to my older son.

Confidently, my older son said it out loud, "Charlie is good looking!"

The rest of us exclaimed in surprise, "What?"

We heard something like "Charlie's good luck" or "Charlie is good luck".  We turned to the phrase originator, my grandson.  The boy looked at us.  He said, "That was not what I said!"

The phrase was "Chinese Year, Good Luck!"

Indeed, the phrase had almost been completely distorted, but the Good remained.  All of us had a good laugh.

Love,
Q of D

He said, "You are sincere . . . "

Greetings!

After the spiritual teacher left, our group met once a month at night.  (Re my posts published in June, Aug., Sept. and Oct. 2016.)  The master healer always came to be with us.  We were very grateful for his dedication to guide us.  Sometimes he met with us for a few more hours on a separate day before he flew back to his state.  It was usually a small group meeting.

The night of the Jan. meeting was very cold and the sky was dark.  I decided to stay home.  Two days later, I was glad to receive an email about a meeting during the daytime.

When I arrived, some people were already there.  There were a young woman and two young men that I met for the first time.  I understood they were therapists working for Matthew.  They were there to learn from the master healer.   Afterward, Matthew introduced me to the young therapists saying I was a powerful healer.  Over the years, I learned to hold my tongue because it was rude for me to interrupt.  Besides, I realized my words did not change anything after others heard what had been said of me.  Matthew continued to say some more about me.  He said, "You do not have an ego.  You are selfless.  You are sincere ... "  When I heard that, I could not help but interrupted, "That's what you said of me.  I do not say that of myself!"  A wise brother that sat next to me lightly tapped my shoulder as his way of telling me to stop.  And, I stopped.  I reacted because his words reminded me of another incident.

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It happened many years ago.  After Sunday service, I was on my way to the parking lot.  Some people were walking toward their cars too.  Suddenly, a woman stopped me.  Her face was red with anger.  She began ranting.

She always sat with her friends that seemed to revere around her.  At church, we hugged or shook hands.  I observed she did not hug or shake hands with people outside of her circle of friends.  One day, a new comer touched her dress saying the fabric was beautiful.  She became very upset.  She said she was highly sensitive.  She did not want others to hug her, touch her hands or clothes because she did not want other's energy to tamper with hers.  The new comer handled herself well that day.  In later years, the new comer occasionally participated in the healing prayer service as I did. 

The woman continued to talk angrily.  It took me quite a while to understand what had happened.

It seemed she had either asked to speak during Sunday service or was already on the list of scheduled speakers.  When the service was over, she asked someone (that was respected at church) to introduce her on the day she would speak.  She was upset because this person turned down her request.  She said, "Before I came to USA, I was highly respected in my country.  I am a well known psychic and author!  It is an honor for him to introduce me, and he says 'no'!  Who does he think he is?"

I was somewhat new to the church.  Other than casual greetings, I had not really talked to anybody.  Of all the people, I did not understand why she stopped me to listen to her.  I could see the anger and hurt on her face.  I did not render any judgment when she asked for my comment on the one that turned her down.  With peace in my heart, I decided to stay there to let her blow off her steam.

In the middle of her ranting, she suddenly stopped.  She lightly tilted her head as if she heard something.  With surprise in her eyes, she said, "Oh, you are sincere!  Your sincerity can change people and make a difference in other people's lives."  Then she went back to lash out at the one that turned her down.

At the end, she said she would never come back to this church again.  I did not say anything to dissuade her.  I looked at her and sent her peace.  It was her decision at that moment, but, it did not mean she would not change her mind in the future.  In a way, I knew she would come back.

For some months, she did not come to church.  Then she came back.  She seemed to have forgotten about what had happened.  She continued to sit by her friends.  She was not someone who greeted everyone.  Knowing her view about energy, I did not sit close to where she was.  On a few occasions, I was surprised she rushed to stand next to me when we formed the opening circle.  She seemed to be at ease holding my hand.  However, she never talked to me.

One day after service, I was talking to a friend when she touched my shoulder.  With light on her face, she said, "I just receive some messages for you.  You are ... " I could not hear her words clearly because many people were chatting.  I told her I was almost done talking to my friend, and would talk to her afterward.  When I looked for her, she was nowhere to be found.  The following week, I asked her about the messages.  She said she only remembered the messages when she received them.

One Sunday, she was the speaker at church.  She talked about her life.  She had a colorful, interesting life.  I moved out of that state 5 years ago.  I learned she had moved on a few years ago.  She lived to her 80 s and was loved by her friends.

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In gatherings, I did not talk much.  From time to time, people said this or that about me.  It was puzzling to me since people did not really know me.  Now, I was more used to these surprises.  However, I still could not help to interrupt when I heard Matthew's words.  Matthew was an instrument.  Sometimes words flowed out of his mouth as if he was channeling.  Interestingly, in the above group meeting, he also said, "You do know that we have known each other in other lifetimes, don't you?"  I nodded.  I fully believed I had known many of the group members in other lifetimes. Was he the brother in Why I had to sign my name before he was to reincarnate?  I did not know. 

All are my brothers and sisters.  So it is.

(As regards to Matthew, please read a latter post The Divine had its way of revealing to me )

Many blessings,
Q of D