Wednesday, May 18, 2022

Red River Valley, and I learn English as I write

Greetings!

This morning I woke up hearing four stanzas of musical notes over and over again.  I knew I could stop it by mentally repeating a mantra (any mantra).  I did not do that because I wanted to figure out if I knew the music.  The music went on and on.  Finally, I spoke into my phone "what song is this?"  It was Red River Valley.
   
As far as I could remember, this could be the third time I heard the music upon waking up.  I was not into country music.  When I heard the tune for the first time, I had to hum into the phone to find out the title.  I had never heard the song before.  I listened to it on YouTube, and soon put it behind me.  Some months later, I woke up to the music again.  I had no idea it was Red River Valley because I had completely forgotten about it.  I used the phone to find out the title.  I recognized the title.  I wondered why I heard the music for the second time.  I listened to different versions and singers singing the song.  The videos of the music did not draw any emotion or reaction from within.  I thought it might be I was sensitive in a way that when someone listened to music in the neighborhood or anywhere and I heard it too.  Of course, it could not explain the phenomenon or why it was like a broken record that kept repeating only certain musical stanzas.  However, that was the way to set things aside.   (Re Music in the Air  about this special phenomenon in my life) 

In life, we did not necessary have to understand everything.  Frankly, it was impossible to understand everything with our human mind.  Sometimes truth might be revealed in matters that puzzled us.  At other times, we might not get to know why this or that happened.  We had to learn to let go, and placed our trust in Life / Life Divine.

Anyway, later this morning, I listened to the music on YouTube.  On the screen were three singers.  The main singer smiled as he sang.  In fact, all of them were peaceful and joyful while singing.  This time around I suddenly felt somewhat sad, and tears filled my eyes.  It was an emotion I felt, but it was not necessary mine.  It might be I felt the sadness of the song - the sadness the man might feel knowing the girl he loved was about to leave.  As I listened, I thought of the time I had to leave the state where the small church was.  Everything happened all at once, and I had to leave in a hurry.  Other things also came to mind.  So there I was, allowing whatever thought or remembrance to come forward.  There was probably sadness within me that I needed to release too.       

In my experiences with the music in the air (or music I perceived), some of them had proven to be meaningful, interesting and at times incredible.  However, as with all of my experiences, sometimes I did not get to understand why things happened.  That might be the case with songs such as Red River Valley and Sukiyaki .  (Re Why did I wake up hearing a song about Japanese food? and Sukiyaki on Christmas morning )

In recent weeks and months, I felt stuck in writing.  I wanted to write about what happened on the day my husband died.  Then I thought I should write about other events that happened earlier first.  For example, about 2 weeks before his death, I was at a spiritual gathering.  The clairvoyant healer saw 5 spirit guides came to surround one participant.  She was moved to tears because she saw how much healing love and light the guides extended to that person.  Over my side, there were only 3 people (including me).  I kind of knew my guides had come because I was in a powerful field of energy.  I left without asking her to confirm.  I met the healer again a couple of months ago.  She confirmed it was me.  There was more to what happened that September day in 2021.  That was why I felt I should write about it.  As I wrote, I realized there were other events that were worth sharing.  Meanwhile, part of me wanted to move on and write about other things.  That was why I had a hard time of finishing a post.  

When I typed into Google 'I felt stuck in writing', I learned it was called 'writer's block' in English.  I had limited English vocabulary.  I learned English as I wrote.  For example, one day long ago I wanted to use the word character or personality, but I 'got' that I should use attribute.  When I looked into the dictionary, attribute was the right word.  Occasionally I stuck in writing because I did not know the word or the name of something.  Sometimes the right word, a word that I did not know, would came to my mind.  The truth was we were all much more than the physical humans we appeared to be.  As a human being, I paid attention to the little wonders and beauty in life.  I did not take things for granted.  In being so, I felt the joy of life.  At times I felt frustrated like everybody else.  However, I knew it was part of life, it would come to pass, and All Is Well.

I have decided what to share in my next post.  The small church is going to have a 3-Day gathering from morning to night.  I have signed up to join my brothers and sisters online.  I will begin writing the next post next week, and hope to finish it before the end of this month.

Many blessings,
Q of D
  

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