Imagine you are a student in a classroom of 45 students. The school bell rings. Everybody stops talking. They take out their textbooks, and put them on the desks. They wait quietly. The teacher is expected to walk in any second now.
Some minutes pass, the teacher does not come. It has never happened before. The teacher always walks in soon after the bell rings. The students look at one another. They start to talk in a soft voice wondering what is going on. Is the teacher sick? If that is the case, why doesn't a substitute teacher show up? Some more minutes pass, there is still no teacher.
A while later, the students conclude that the teacher must be absent, otherwise, she would have shown up. They realize it means there will be no class and no teacher to watch over them! They feel elated in this unexpected free time. They begin to chat, and some leave their seats to hang out with their buddies in the class.
Suddenly, they hear the loudest yell in their life. They turn to look at the entrance of the classroom. There stands the principal! With her hands resting on her waist and her face reddened by anger, she stomps into the classroom! The students who have left their seats quickly return to their seats. The stillness that follows is a sharp contrast to what has been seconds earlier.
The principal scolds them. How unacceptable their behavior have been! Their voices are disruptive to the students who are in the classrooms next to them. Although the teacher is not there, but they should know what is expected of them. The students lower their heads. They know they are wrong.
The principal continues: "For those of you who have misbehaved, you will be hit 3 times on each hand (by a wooden ruler). You also have to write 200 times 'I will never chat again during class'. You have to hand it in before you can go home. Those who have misbehaved, stand up now!"
A few students stand up. Some students stand up after them. Slowly, some more students reluctantly follow. They would have stayed in their seats if others have not chosen to stand up. Eventually, only a handful of students remain sitting in their chairs. These few who are still sitting down either look straight forward at the principal, or look downwards at their desks. They never look at their fellow classmates especially those whom they have chatted with a while earlier.
One by one, those who have stood up walk forward to the principal and receive the punishment. Before she leaves, the principal praises the few who have supposedly behaved as they are expected. After she leaves, most of the students begin writing the sentence 'I will never chat again during class'. Everybody is quiet. Nobody wants to say anything. Every now and then, the students who are writing look over to their classmates who do not have to write. Both try to look away when their eyes meet.
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What would you do if you are one of the students? Will you be among the first few who stand up? Or, will you be among the second group? Or, do you choose to wait it out until most have made up their mind, and then you will decide what to do? Or, do you think those who remain sitting down are the smartest of all?
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Whatever you think you will do, you are the only one who knows the answer. Nobody is going to judge you. That is not what this post is about.
A few days ago, out of nowhere, I 'heard': "Were you afraid that you might be punished when you wrote about that incident?" All of a sudden, the above incident came to my mind. It was ancient history, and I wasn't thinking about it at all! Mentally, I responded to the question: "No. It never crossed my mind that I might get into trouble writing about it." It was weird, but it happened.
Later that day, I started writing this post. However, it happened a long time ago. I could not recall the incident clearly. Furthermore, what happened that day in the classroom seemed to be very insignificant in the dramas of life. "What was the point of writing this post?" I wondered. However, part of me felt that I should because of how it resurfaced in my mind. As I said, I wasn't thinking about it at all.
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A couple of days after what happened in the classroom, we had our weekly English composition class. I did not recalled if the teacher gave us a title, or we were allowed to write what we chose. Anyway, I wrote about the classroom incident. I recalled at the end of my composition, I wrote something like this -
- One by one, the students walked forward to receive the punishment. While I waited for my turn, I looked out of the window. I saw an apple tree near the wall of the playground. I thought of the childhood story of George Washington and the apple tree.
I did well in Chinese composition, but I failed English composition all the time. I believed this was the marking system for English composition when I was in school: 40 points for grammar, and 4 or 5 points were deducted for each mistake; 40 points for content, most students got 10s to low 20s, with high 20s to 30 as the top marks for content; most students got 10s for the remaining 20 points. 60 out of 100 was the passing score. Although I might get a good mark for content, but I could not make up for the 40 points counted towards grammar because I usually got a zero.
Normally, in Chinese and English composition, scores of high 70s to low 80s were the top scores. Those compositions were displayed at the back of the classroom for others to read and learn from. As a teenager, I regarded my writing as something personal, and did not really want others to read what I wrote. So I was not as joyful as other students when my compositions were being shown.
Incidentally, my writing on the incident got a good grade, and it was posted for others to read. Many of my classmates told me they liked my writing. However, I also realized what I wrote must have caused some uneasiness among those who did not stand up. In fact, after the incident in the classroom, a cloud had already been looming over the class.
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For days I could not finish this post. I almost wanted to delete it. I stuck after describing the incident, and I felt the story about my composition was irrelevant.
Yesterday I suddenly realized the different reactions to what happened that day in the classroom might be viewed as a reflection of a society or a community responding to a crisis.
When a crisis arose, people reacted differently partly due to the differences of our character and personality. What we had been taught or had learned in life also played a role in our process of making a decision. Some people rose to the occasion, and took up the responsibility. Some people took another approach to solve the problem that they faced. Some people froze in time of urgency, and it took them more time to decide what to do. Some people thought of others and tried to help whatever they could. Some people thought only of themselves and did whatever to protect their own interest in the time of a crisis. If we put right or wrong aside, all reactions are relevant.
In any situation or crisis, there are lessons here and there for everyone. I (or we) should hold myself accountable for my own action, and looked at life from there.
Looking back, I am glad most of us in the class took responsibilities of our action. We were wrong and we knew it. The principal might have lost her cool on that occasion, but she was a good principal. During those years, she taught us good values and how to conduct ourselves with integrity.
Good night!
Many blessings,
Q of D
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