Greetings!
"What is life?" Have you ever asked yourself this question?
I had asked myself this question many times since I was a teenager. Some years ago, a news story on the Chinese newspaper made me think about this question again.
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A bamboo pole fell from a building. It hit a woman who happened to walk by. Sadly, the woman died. Incidentally, her husband died in a similar accident 15 years ago.
In some Asian countries, people that living in high-rise buildings washed their clothes by hand. Later, they hung them outside of the building on bamboo poles to dry. However, this kind of accidents was rare.
The woman's life story touched the hearts of many. As you read her story below, you may understand why.
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After her husband's death, she was left with two small children and a mother-in-law who was blind. For 15 years, she worked very, very hard to support her family. She worked from morning to night holding onto three jobs. All her neighbors praised her. They said she was the best daughter-in-law anybody could wish for, and she was a very loving mother too. They thought that this wonderful woman could finally look forward to better days because her two children were in their last year of secondary school. Instead, before her children finished secondary school, she died in such an unthinkable tragic accident as her husband did.
After her death, her children did not accept any help or donation. The older daughter quit school and found a job. She took up the responsibility of supporting her brother and taking care of their grandmother. (In where they lived, they had to pay tuition for the last few years of secondary school.)
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In our human mind, we wished for good endings for good people. This woman had worked hard since the tragic death of her husband. She took care of her blind mother-in-law, and was a loving mother to her children. Why would such a good woman died of a horrific death especially when her children were about to graduate from school? Her tragedy shook the whole society. People wondered about the existence of a loving god.
Indeed, at times it was hard to come to terms with life or God. As humans, we longed for a supreme being or beings to watch over us because we felt powerless towards the uncertainty of life, e.g. death, accidents, disease, sudden downturns of life, tsunami, and other natural disasters. When we heard of tragedies like this, our belief in a just, loving God was shaken if not shattered. "What is life?" we asked.
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In another news story, a man won the lottery jackpot. His sister and some of his friends had taken care of him when he was poor and unemployed. However, once he had money, he moved into a mansion far away from where he used to live. He cut his connection to his sister and those who had been kind to him. He wanted to keep all the money to himself. (The man lived in an European country.)
"Why in the world would such a greedy, mean, and ungrateful man deserve to win the lottery?" we wondered.
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In some cultures and religions, the word 'karma' (or cause and effect) was deeply planted in people's mind. People believed one's present had much to do with what he had done in this lifetime as well as in past lifetimes. In other words, how one conducted this life would affect one's future lifetimes. With this belief, some people concluded whatever adversity one faced, for instance, physical malformation, illnesses, poverty, and accidents, was the result of one's past bad deeds. Likewise, good health, success, wealth, and a good, long life were the rewards of one's past good deeds.
So some people concluded the man who won the lottery must have done something good in other lifetimes.
Then, how should we look at the woman's life?
Some people easily quoted from scriptures or books about the punishing side of life. They made insensitive comments when misfortunes befell other people, or when they came across people with physical challenged conditions. They thought they knew life, but they had as yet learned the importance of compassion. Life was far more complicated than what seemed to be on the surface.
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In a book written by a known psychic/medium, she wrote about a true story of a woman who went to see her with the intention of making the final decision about her marriage. The woman had married a man who loved her truthfully and was very responsible. However, her mother-in-law was the problem in their marriage. They lived in separate houses, but her mother-in-law came by all the time. Worse yet she could not stop criticizing the woman such as the house was not clean enough, this was done wrong, and that was wrong. When the woman complained to her husband, he said he could not talk to his mother about her nagging. His mother raised him, and he was her only child. He begged his wife to be patient with his mother. When the wife went to the psychic, she was ready to file for a divorce because she could not take the mother-in-law's nagging anymore.
In order to find out if what happened presently had anything to do with their past conflicts; the medium guided the woman into a past-life regression. Instead of getting into a previous lifetime, the woman found herself joyfully talking to a woman, her mother-in-law! There was so much love between them that they were the best of friends. They were planning for their present lifetime. She asked her friend to be her mother-in-law. She told her to be the most nagging or hard to deal with mother-in-law because she wanted to learn the lesson of patience. At first, her friend did not want to play that role. Out of love, her friend finally agreed to be her nagging mother-in-law. The woman saw herself excitedly planning for this lifetime with her friend. She also learned it was in divine order that her husband would not interfere or stand up for her so that she could learn her lesson of patience.
After the regression, the woman found peace. When her mother-in-law criticized her, she looked at 'her friend' with a smile. Occasionally, she walked to her and gave her a heartfelt hug. She no longer saw the nagging as an annoyance, but an act of love. The story could have ended differently with everybody involved getting hurt. There was love between the woman and her husband. By the Grace of Love, she sought help, and she got help.
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Most recently, we witnessed the horrific Boston Bombing. There was a beautiful young woman who lost her left leg. She was a dance teacher. The loss of a limb was a big blow to anybody not to mention a dance teacher. However, she did not dwell on her loss. Instead, she vowed she would continue to dance. She was an inspiration in this time of darkness. May her light of courage continue to shine and inspire wherever she is.
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I did not dispute karma played a role in our life. However, in my opinion, it was erroneous to look at life simply as a system of punishment and awards (or merits). My spirit guide said that any physical challenge or life difficulty was never meant to be a punishment, but something we chose to go through. It could be a lesson we wanted to learn or a challenge we wanted to overcome. (Please view my posts Life is a Wowing Experience and Why do people come into a lifetime with a physical challenge)
The way the woman and her husband both died after being hit by bamboo poles might seem horrific and painful to us. However, when we planned for our life on the other side, we might look at things differently. We were courageous souls, and were not afraid of death because we knew we did not die. Therefore, it was hard to look at what happened in life from the human point of view. For instance, would you have wanted a nagging mother-in-law so that you could learn patience if you were in the human frame of mind?
Other than sadness and compassion, what comes to your mind when you read about the woman's story who died in the bamboo pole accident?
To me, the woman had lived an extraordinary life of perseverance. Her strength and love must have played an important part in her daughter's decision to decline help, and courageously take up the responsibility that she had left behind.
"What is life?" Well, whatever happens nowadays, I no longer ask myself this question. Sometimes I may wonder why this or that happens, but I know All Is Well in the Loving Divine.
I dedicate this post to all the loving, courageous brothers and sisters.
Peace,
Q of D
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