Greetings!
On the 7th day after my husband moved on, I burnt some incense sticks at night. In my heart, I talked to my husband and the Divine. (Re Part 1 - Death and Cultural Customs )
Seeing that, my son asked why I burnt some incense sticks. I told him the 7th day after one moved on was an important day in our Chinese culture. Hearing that, he went to look at his father's picture. With his hands folded in a prayer position, he stood there for a while. I did not know what he said in his heart. I did not tell him that I prayed for his father to come into his dreams. I ususally went to bed between 1 to 2 a.m. Therefore, it was already the 8th day when I went to sleep.
That morning I had two dreams. My dreams were short, and both could be about future events. Upon waking up, I heard Sukiyaki over and over in the air. (Posts on Sukiyaki Why did I wake up hearing a song about Japanese food? and Sukiyaki on Christmas Morning )
Around 9 in the morning, my son called me from work. He had a dream about his father! His father walked in the same way as he used to after taking a walk. He wore his regular clothes, and looked the same before he got sick. They greeted each other. It was a short dream. My son was happy to see his father in the dream. I was happy for him too because he truly missed his father.
My son rarely talked to me about dreams. The only other time he shared a dream with vivid descriptions and details was long, long time ago. He had a past life kind of dream in a country in South America. At the time, I was not into journaling. I did not remember the details of his dream. I only knew the story seemed so real to my son that caused him to examine his view and value toward life.
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Nine days later, my son dreamed about his father again. In his dream, his father walked in wearing his blue jean and dark blue jacket with the hood on. His father said it was raining outside (that was why he had the hood on). (Indeed, it rained during the night and morning.) His father pulled down the hood. My son was very surprised to see that his father looked young and with a full head of black hair! (In life, his hair was thin and mostly white.) My son told me that his father looked exactly like the way he was when he was a boy. He said I was in the dream, and his father talked to both of us. However, all the while my son could not help looking at his father, and wondered how his father could look that young again. He said, "Mom, if this happens in life, Dad needs to spend a lot of money to make himself look like that!" I told him I was not surprised because I read that we all looked in our 20 s or 30 s on the other side; of course, some might choose the image they preferred, young or old.
Later that day, I talked to my son about dreams. I asked if he actually saw colors and images in his dreams. He was surprised that I asked.
He said, "Of course, I see what one wears and every detail as if in everyday life. When I eat something in the dream, I see the color and feel the taste. I also smell everything as if in life. My dreams are not any different from what happen in life. Don't you dream as I do?"
I said, "No. Many of my dreams are feel dreams. In other words, I only feel what goes on. Sometimes a particular image may stand out. For example, I dreamed that I was in a store, I did not see the setting of a store; then, I saw a vivid image of a red chair in there. I seldom have vivid dreams as you do. When I do, those dreams normally carry some sort of significance. Oh . . . sometimes I may see color, but I do not feel the taste or smell as you do. I may feel something was delicious, but that is all I feel."
My son was surpised. He thought everybody had dreams as he did. The settings of his dreams were not any different from everyday life.
I was glad that we talked. I used to think that other people sometimes only felt what went on in their dreams as I did. Now, I knew my assumption was off. In My dream experiences are part of my life story , we stood next to one another as if we took our position getting ready for the next phase of life. Recently I reread my journal, and noticed people lying in bed without human emotion had a similar meaning. Oftentimes, there was no image, and might include people we did not know / had yet come to know. Though there was no image, I got the impression of young, old, average size, slim, tall and etc.
Many of my dreams were not of everyday life. Therefore, I often kept my dreams to myself. Sometimes I had dreams as if in ordinary broad daylight as well as in light setting in higher dimension where I did not have the sense of a solid ground. ( e.g. A Play on the Stage of Life and Dreams and the Unfoldment in Life ) I noticed I occasionally reacted with my human emotion in dreams that were not of this dimension. At times, the setting of my dreams was dark or without light. To me that symbolized mystery. Sometimes I was in the dream, yet part of me was observing the dream. I had dreamed of meeting other beings. I had out of body experience, and had seen my body sleeping soundly on the bed. One day I was by the window seeing my sons and their friend drove off. Then I sat on my bed and closed my eyes. The next minute I (or my spirit) was flying, and soon found myself inside a mall in another country. I was looking down from the ceiling of the mall. I saw everything clearly. Meanwhile, the me on the bed knew very well I could stop the 'vision' whenever I chose to. After a while, I pulled myself back to where I / my body was. There were times my husband found it puzzling that I knew what happened around me even though he saw me deep in my sleep. For example, I knew who used the bathroom, what they talked about or what went on in the family room. However, that was the younger or more energetic me. I was not that alert anymore. In recent years, I felt tired. Sometimes I did not know my son had left to go to work.
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Four days after his second dream, my son dreamed about his father again.
In the dream, my son worked in the family room as he did when he worked from home. He heard someone walked in. It was his father. He was surprised because he felt his father did not come through the door. His father greeted him and proceeded to walk to the bedroom. He followed his father and asked, "How do you come in?" (These were not the exact words because I did not take the time to write down what happened after my son told me his dream.)
He followed his father into the bedroom. His father sat on the bed. Son said, "Dad, you know Mom, XXXX (his brother), and your grandchildren loved you. Why did you leave / die?" His father said, "Yes, I know, but you see, I do not have stomach pain anymore." Son looked at his father's stomach. It was no longer bloated. His father looked healthy. His appearance was as he was before he got sick. (In this dream, his father was not young as seen in the second dream.) With his warrior nature, Son still wished his father had not died. He wanted to ask some more questions. He woke up before he finished his question.
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Sixteen days later, my son dreamed about his father for the fourth time. His father sat on the couch and talked to him. My son could not recall what the talk was about. He concluded his father was probably talking about normal stuff. Then he heard his father said for him to pay attention to his alarm. My son woke up, and his alarm was indeed beeping.
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I had heard some people moved on right after their physical death. For instance, a man appeared to a pastor in a body of light after his physical death. In the morning, his wife informed the pastor that her husband had passed away in his sleep. I also read that some people (ghost) remained in the state that they moved on for a long time because they did not realize that they had died. In one case, a man that died in a shipwreck stayed that way for 200 years. In The Dream of Three Japanese Soldiers , my spirit guide helped me to guide the soldiers to the light too.
I was glad my son had dreams about his father. Some people were not sensitive to dreams, and might not be open to have such dreams. When my son dreamed about his father for the fourth time, over five weeks had gone by. In less than two weeks, the 49 days period would come to an end.
Had my husband completed his transition?
Did our culture play a role in his after death experience?
Stay tuned.
Love and Blessings,
Q of D
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