Greetings!
While looking through the plastic totes for the transcript (Re As we give, we also receive ), I saw an old notebook turned to a page that I had marked 5 stars on the top indicating either a profound experience or a very interesting dream.
The 5 stars profound experience took place in the early hours of April 13, 2005.
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Early 2005, I learned from a spiritual magazine that a known spiritual teacher and a famous medium would be coming to our state to host an event in April. I had read their books, and found their stories fascinating. I had never gone to any public spiritual event like that before. I thought how exciting it would be if I could go, but the ticket price was too expensive. It might be I had never spent much money on myself or for my own needs / wants. Besides, it was not near where I lived, and I did not know how to drive there by myself. Above all, I could not register online because I did not have a credit / debit card (at the time).
Weeks later in a conversation with my younger son, I mentioned the event. He asked if I wanted to go. I said it was too expensive. He said he would go with me. He said I should not be concerned about money - it was only a one time expense because we did not go to this kind of events all the time. (His words are always assuring and wise! 😊😊) I said I would think about it. I did not give him a firm answer because I knew he was not interested in the event as I did. Was it worth going since we would be paying for two tickets instead of one? In the days / weeks that followed, I prayed for an answer if we should or should not go.
Before I went to sleep on March 1, 2005, I thought it would be nice if I could go to the event. With that thought in mind, I had a hard time of falling asleep.
With everything all set, I began to envision what I wished to happen during the event. I hoped to get a reading by the medium. Would my dear mother come through? I thought about the relatives that were now on the other side such as my grandfathers (paternal and maternal). I was excited the spiritual teacher came to our state. I had not met him before. I hoped to have a chance to talk to him. (There was a personal reason I wanted to talk to him.)
On the day of the April event, I was awakened during my sleep to see 4:44 a.m. (444 means the Power of God's Love) I took it as a confirmation that something special was going to happen!
With high expectations, I went to the event. I sat inside the car with gratitude - grateful to the Divine as well as to my sons who accompanied me. I expected the ride and in fact everything would go smoothly. After all, my younger son did it on his own to register online on March 10. Going to the event with my sons must be in divine order, I thought. And, seeing 4:44 a.m. on the day of the event was a confirmation!
My younger son had looked up the directions online. (At the time, we did not have a GPS device.) We left our apartment early because we did not want to be late. However, there was a lot of traffic. I recalled we might have missed a turn. To put a long story short, we walked into the auditorium just minutes before the speaker came on the stage; the place was packed with thousands of people (that was my guess), and the only seats that were available were at the end of the auditorium (i.e. by the back wall of the auditorium)! It was a huge auditorium. From where I sat, I could barely see the stage. The spiritual teacher talked for quite some time. Then he said he was going to guide us into an exercise. I began to cough hard. I went to the restroom until I stopped coughing. When I came back, the lecture / the first half of the event was over. Of course, later I was not among the few that received readings from the medium. What the teacher and the medium taught were nothing new to me because I had read their books. On the way home, I was quiet. I was deeply disappointed at how things had unfolded. I believed sons suggested for us to eat at a restaurant, and I said 'no'. It was my fault that we spent hundred of dollars for nothing, I thought.
Earlier that month, I had experienced some disappointment in another matter. After the event, I was in a state of total disappointment. Everything that led up to the event seemed to be divinely planned! I did not sleep well at night. The next day I slept until almost noon. Later in the afternoon my husband and I went shopping for grocery. In the car, words seemed to come to me, but I refused to listen. I turned on the CD player, and sang the song. I looked at the scenery outside. Suddenly, my head turned to look at the time inside the car. It was 4:44 p.m.! I practically stopped singing right there. I took a deep breath. 444 the Power of God's Love . . . . but I did not know what to think of all of these.
At night I spent my time watching TV. At one point, I thought other people needed to hear the messages from the medium more than me. It was true. Though I sat far from the stage, I could hear the pain in the voices of the few that were chosen by the medium. The messages delivered by the medium brought them comfort and healing. I recalled feeling happy for those that received messages. With this thought, I calmed down somewhat. However, I still felt frustrated and disappointed. The whole thing was like a set up. I was emotionally hyped because all that happened before the event, and I fell down hard afterward.
When I went to bed, I still did not want to pray or talk to my guides and angels. I rarely had dreams of anger. In the morning of April 12, I actually woke up from a dream in which I yelled at other people. The energy above and around my head vibrated throughout the day. At times the vibration was intense. I got it there was a lesson for me to learn. Below was what I wrote down on my journal before I went to sleep.
Angels and guides, any words from you.
Was I wrong to have expectations?
Oh, never mind. I am going to sleep. As I said, if nothing happened, I would drop the whole thing ***. I am not going to waste my energy on it.
I have enough of this.
Good Night.
(*** i.e. stopped searching for the truth regarding the message I received in the last quarter of 1999 and the questions I had after the 2001 reading by the known angel channel)
It takes me a long time to learn how true it is that my guide said 'you can be happy no matter what' and You feel pain because you let pain be . Emotions are part of a physical life, and it is important for us to take responsibility of our own emotional wellbeing.
I sighed. I pulled the blanket over my head. Immediately, I felt something was happening. I asked, "What is happening to me?" I seemed to be dissolving or being absorbed by other force. I felt my body or boundary no longer existed. In this shock, I found I was not in fear! In a calm and firm manner, I telepathically said, "I believe in the all loving God." I saw an eye. Then the force that tried to absorb me vanished.
Before I could recover from the first incident, I was in another state. I found my whole being was expanding and expanding. Again, I asked, "What is happening to me?" I thought I might be leaving my body for an astral journey or that was how one felt when one was about to go on an astral travel. I felt my being was about to explode. I also felt the presence of a force, and understood that force was the cause of what was taking place. Again, I had no fear. I firmly stated "I believe in the loving God." I kept repeating what I believed in. The force that caused me to almost explode vanished. I was back to myself.
I pulled the blanket aside. Widely awoke, I knew I was not dreaming. I went over my experience. I could still recall the 'terrible' state I was in when I felt my body was dissolving. I marveled at how firm and sure that I calmly stated "I believe in the all loving God." When I soon found myself expanding and about to explode, my first response was shock. Right then, I said what I believed in. I was calm and peaceful.
So there I was, laying on bed widely awoke with my eyes closed, recalled what had just happened. Then I had the third experience of the night.
In my mind eye, my husband wearing all white climbed onto the bed. He wanted to . . ., and I refused to submit to him. He madly yelled at me saying something like "you are my wife! How dare you . . ." The man in white looked very fierce as if he was really going to get me. Again, I was calm and peaceful. I firmly stated "I believe in God, the all loving God. The god you believe in is not the loving force. That is why I will not let you." As soon as I said that, he vanished. I understood the man was the evil force disguised as my husband.
Still with my eyes closed, I got the understanding that I had passed 3 tests. I was proud that the faith of the real / true me was (is) as should be - sure, firm, and never wavered. I also got it with my eyes closed that the time on the clock was 4:42 a.m. turning to 4:43 a.m. I opened my eyes, and rushed to see the time. It was 4:43 a.m. My heart was filled with awe. I said, "God, angels, and guides, you used to wake me up at 4:44 a.m. Tonight I am going to watch the time turns to 4:44 a.m. I am open to receive the Power of God's Love." After seeing 4:44 a.m., I lay down and fell asleep.
Something interesting happened later that night too.
My younger son and I were talking by the dining table in the kitchen. My husband was in the family room. There was a wall that separated the kitchen area and the family room. My husband asked, "Why do you leave the TV on Ch. 4? Shouldn't you be watching American Idol on Ch. 2?" Earlier, I had watched part of American Idol; when commercial came on, I turned to watch Alias on Ch. 7. In other words, I had been watching both Ch. 2 and Ch. 7. (Yes, I live a pretty ordinary / normal life.) When I went to the kitchen, I must have accidentally left the TV on Ch. 4. I told my husband to simply turn to Ch. 2 if he wanted to watch American Idol. Soon he asked why I left the TV on Ch. 4 again. I told him to turn to Ch. 2 if he wanted to watch American Idol. Not long after, he asked me the same question again. So I walked over to the family room with the intention to turn the TV to Ch. 2. I did not change the channel. On the TV was a talk about Dan Brown's book. It was said Jesus and Mary of Magdalene had a daughter. I realized it did not happen by accident that Ch. 4 was on. That night I lay in bed wondering if I would ever get some answers to my questions. I knew my search for truth or answers would continue. (Please view my post If we love Jesus, how can we slight the one he loves the most and you will understand why I realized the Ch. 4 incident did not happen by accident. )
All of these happened on April 13, 2005. The number 13 was (is) a significant number on my spiritual journey. For instance, on June 13, 2009 I got the answers that I had been looking for from a book which was confirmed in a channeled reading a few years later. (Re Sometimes I never know how a day is going to be ) On June 13, 2016 I signed up for Meetup, and had since joined many interesting zoom meetings. There were many people with special gifts and abilities. It was amazing to listen to their stories.
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2005 was one of the important years on my spiritual journey. On Sundays from late Feb. to March, 2005, I stepped outside of my family to sit among hundreds of peoples for the very first time. On March 20, 2005, I delivered a copy of the words of Christ to the pastor and left. (Re Words of Christ and the 4444 Incident - Part 2 ) On May 26, 2005 I joined the Thursday Circle. In 2005 my husband continued to spend lots of hours in practicing the moves, and did not look well. I was quite worried about him. It was by divine grace that I received love and support from my friends at the circle.
